I'm typically one that wants answers.
I like to know why something is a certain way.
I like to understand the meaning behind life, and things, and people.
I like to have everything figured out, with no questions, no doubt.
And so for me to have faith in the God of the Universe--I've had to let go of having answers.
For me to understand the grace Jesus has given me--I've had to stop understanding why.
In order for me to trust in an all-loving, all-powerful, all-consuming God--I've had to experience lots of questions with lots of doubt.
And for me--doubts and questions and fears are not things that are here today and then gone tomorrow.
The things about God I questioned years ago, I still question.
The theology, the history, and the mystery of God's relentless love--sometimes I have a hard time beliving in those things.
But there is faith.
But the greatest of these is love.
And what I have learned and am continuing to learn is that love trumps all.
When Jesus comes back and reveals Himself to us--there will be no more need for faith. Or hope. Because everything we have believed in will be reality.
But love--love is eternal. It never ends.
So when I doubt and lack faith and hope--the answer is to love.
Because love will last.
I don't need to have everything figured out to love.
Love into the questions.
Love into the doubt.
Love into the insecurities.
I think one of the coolest things about love is that it's a choice.
There's no one forcing us to love Jesus with all of hearts.
There's no one making us love our neighbor as ourself.
It's a choice.
In fact, love has already won.
And choosing love is us saying that Jesus Christ will reign in our hearts--no matter the cost.
It is merciful.
Love is grace.
I have found God's love the most in my life when I've just stopped.
Stopped trying to know evertying.
Stopped trying to plan my life just like I want it.
Stopped asking questions.
Stopped demanding things.
Love is most present in my life when I give up control.
When I say, "Yes, Jesus, Your love is enough."
Love is found in surrender.
In living presently.
Love is knowing that He is enough.
His love is enough.
I don't need to have everything figured out to rest in that love.
My love towards God is not found in me knowing more, or doing more, or being the best person I can possibly be.
Love is knowing that I am flawed.
And messed up.
Love tells me that I don't need to be perfect.
Love tells me that who I am in this moment is enough.
I choose love.
Over every question.
I choose love. Because love always wins.